About six months ago when I started this blog, I wasn’t sure how I would feel about putting such personal and emotionally painful experiences into words for anyone to read. I wasn’t sure who else was out there that may be writing about miscarriages and infertility and whether or not connections would be created through the blogging world. It was a new realm of social media for me and I didn’t know what to expect. What would my friends and family think? What would my husband think? I had been writing for a couple of weeks before I even told my husband about my blog. With so much uncertainty, I decided to be an anonymous blogger.
When I started writing, I just knew that I needed this place to put my heartbreak and confusion and sadness. I needed a way to honor the babies that I had lost. I needed a way to tell people close to me what I had been through without having to talk through the story over and over again. I hoped that others would understand why I was writing and how much it helped me to share my story. Writing seems to give me a place to put my pain so that I don’t have to carry it with me all the time.
As I began writing, the connections slowly started with one “like” and one comment. I’m not a blogger with a lot of followers, but I have now connected with enough of you to know that in this journey, I am not alone. What I have discovered is that there are so many of us struggling with infertility, pregnancy loss or both. I have discovered that the stories are different but the pain and heartache are the same. I have discovered empathy and support from people that I’ve never met in person. I’ve discovered an online support group that I wish I had found 3 years ago. I don’t want to be anonymous behind my story. I’m so much more than the words that I share about this one part of my life.
So, here it goes. This is me.
My name is Chrissy and…..
I am 41 years old.
I love photography and I enjoy taking pictures of anything that I think is pretty. I have my own Etsy shop where I sell cards of my photographs.
I hate to cook but married someone who loves to cook (thank goodness).
I met my husband on eHarmony. I never believed in love at first sight until I met him.
We got engaged 5 months later.
When I was a kid, I was a gymnast, a swimmer and a ballet dancer. I quit gymnastics and swimming almost 30 years ago but I can still do a cartwheel and I can still swim butterfly.
I am a stepmom to a teenage boy.
I’ve had an 18 year career in the biopharmaceutical industry.
Until I started this infertility journey I was very career driven. Now I’m very baby driven.
On our honeymoon, we got to go to many places including Paris, Aix-en-Provence, Nice, Cannes, and Monaco. It was a dream come true. I found out that Pierre Hermé macarons are delicious and it was worth our trek through Paris in the pouring rain to find them.
I have 3 siblings and I love them so much!
Sometimes I accidentally snort when I laugh.
I am a melanoma survivor.
My favorite flowers are Gerbera daisies.
I have a sweet tooth weakness for dark chocolate, chocolate cake and peppermint patties.
My guilty pleasure is watching “The Bachelor” or “The Bachelorette” TV shows. And by the way, if any of you are in Bachelor Nation, you’ve got to check out the blog, www.Ihategreenbeans.com for the Bachelor Recaps. You will not stop laughing.
I had a very happy childhood including an awesome teddy bear collection, wonderful grandparents, loving and dedicated parents, lots of pets, and my Dad rocket launching my sister and I into the air in every hotel pool we visited. My mom has been my rock through everything in life.
I think The Muppets are totally awesome.
“Sixteen Candles” is my favorite movie.
I think I have my mom’s eyes and my dad’s smile.
I love giggle fits with my sister.
Thanks for getting to know me.
Wedding photography: Mary Bernsen
Other images: CJE